Christmas Traditions

Every family has their own yuletide traditions, whether it be a simultaneous assault on the presents, shredding paper and squealing with delight, or a decorous morning imbibing sherry while each gift is enjoyed in turn. Some are about the spiritual meanings of the holidays, while some are solely about consumer culture. Whatever works for you. I have been thinking about what I want for my little monkey when it comes to Christmas so here are a few traditions I will be forcing upon her.

Hats: Christmas is not complete without them (and if you knew me in my teen years you will know that I feel life is not complete without a few good hat opportunities). Sweaty cracker hats is a good start but basically anything festive, sparkly, or with ears/antlers will do the job.

Celebrating through the medium of song: I start amping up the singing of Xmas ditties around the end of October so that by now, when finishing up my Crimbo shopping I am singing along, full bore without a care in the world. Keeps me sane and ensures I have enough space to move around the crowded shops as other buyers shrink from my dulcet tones.

Cartoons: I have to get one on DVD every Christmas for watching on the afternoon, after the turkey. Last year it was Wall-E and I slept through most of it... This year is cheap - Wall-E again!

Letters to Father C: I was born a skeptic, I grew up a skeptic and am a skeptic now. Does it stop me writing to Santa on Christmas Eve? Does it stop me leaving out a mince pie, some sherry and a carrot for Rudolph? No. The charade is part of the fun.

House arrest: In my family Christmas is about being together (and eating all the food that has been bought whether you want to or not) and so we get together from about the 23rd and don't leave the house again until (on a good year) about 4th January. By that time we are all ready to leave and face another year!

I think that pretty much covers it. Is there anything I have forgotten that I need to foist upon her? Anything that will enrich her experience year on year? I don't think so - as long as she is in a silly hat, she can face pretty much anything!

Countdown to Christmas Day 14 - No Tree for Me

Christmas has always been an enormous event in my household - Granny Bloggings is a big believer in 'doing Christmas properly', a strange sentiment from a non-Christian, but hey ho, it means I've always done well in the present department so I'm not complaining. Come to think of it, she is like that about pretty much any celebration. Come to think of it, she is like that about pretty much everything. Anyway, enough rambling, suffice to say, Christmas is a decadent, turkey-gorging, present-avalanche, sparkle-fest in our house. It's a time for family to come together to eat, eat more and be merry. We do the tree in late November, we wrap presents in August, we sing carols ALL YEAR ROUND in anticipation. Are you getting the idea?

But this year I am finding it hard to get into the spirit. I have lost my festive mojo as it were. I am cheer-less. I haven't even mustered the energy to put up a single decoration and no matter how much I listen to Mariah Carey telling me what it is she wants for Christmas I just can't get in mood. Bah. Humbug.

I thought about putting up a tree to provoke my enthusiasm but then remembered that with a Little CK crawling around like a little spider monkey (perhaps I shall rename her), it would be fair game for her and soil on my new carpet wouldn't help the mood. I thought about organising a Christmas shindig here with my friends, but have left it too late and they will all be too drunk on mulled wine by now to coordinate their diaries, let alone get here for festive frolicking. I even bought my child's first ever Christmas present (yes only one Christmas present, see what I mean? There is something wrong here) on a well-known marketplace website...

And now, my mate Carol Kirkwood on BBC Breakfast tells me there is the threat of a wonderful white Christmas to jeopardise our travel plans, keeping us from the gorging that we are booked in for over the Christmas weekend.

So I need some inspiration folks, what can I do to get in the mood? How can I re-discover my yuletide magic? And don't say that eating a whole pack of mince pies in one sitting will work. I've tried it. It doesn't.